Recently I celebrated my 37th Birthday. In my last blog I wrote, “Today I am 2/3 of my birth order….”. What I didn’t see coming was the change in that order. In the progression of four days the truth would unfold.
Sunday morning ( 2 days after my birthday) during the announcements at church, I received a message from my sister. It was a picture of two people I had never seen in my life, but at first glance of them, I felt like I knew them. The message read, “Who do they look like?” My response was, “Odell’s people for sure.” I’m guilty of calling my parents by their first names, when talking to my siblings…it’s our thing for many reasons. Again, I was in church, so I put my phone away, but couldn’t shake those faces from my mind.
That evening I was at church again for a worship night. Literally, as the worship team started to walk on the stage, my phone rang.This time a group call from both of my younger sisters. I sent a message to be sure things were ok and that I would call back afterward. For the next two days I missed the group call because ya girl is busy. Tuesday evening I had just walked through the door and hugged my hubby when I received another message. The message read, “Sis, when will you be home? Can I call you?” Finally, I answered. I mostly listened. For the next, what seemed like hours, my sister shared the story of who the two people were in the photo she sent me. My stomach was in a knot, as I sat in my bathroom in disbelief. Twins? Brother and sister? Our half siblings? No one knew about them…not even dad? What in the Maury is happening here? And just like that my entire life as I believed; especially concerning my place in my family, all went out the window. All along there has been 12 of us….not 10.
I have have since spoken with my dad and processed some of this with him, but I’ve mostly talked with my husband and the Lord about it all. So much of my identity was wrapped up in my “place” in my family because I’ve never really felt as though I belonged to begin with. I’ll write more about that in my next blog, but for now I’m taking time to work through all the feelings I didn’t know I’d have, seeing I’ve never been here before. It makes sense as to why the Lord gave me the word “Courage” at the top of the year – He knew I’d need it. Thank God for His sufficient grace through it all.
-Tab
“But he said to me, ” My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.” – 2 Corinthians 12:9
gazellegatherings.com 